Having a sister can be the best thing in the world. I am very lucky to have Amber as mine. She is my best friend, and the one I could always go to for anything. I miss her so much. Some days are better than others, and I wish today was one of those. But it's not. I wonder if she knew how important she was to me. I wonder if she knew how much I loved her, and how much I still do. I don't know what do do anymore. My birthday is next week, and I hate that she won't be there to share it with me. It feels like I don't know how to grow up anymore. At least not without watching her do it all first. Tori asks about her all the time. Sometimes it scares me how smart she is. She is just like Amber. It makes me happy to know that after me Amber will always live on through Victoria. I just hope that I will be able to make Adam understand how wonderful and amazing his Auntie Amber is. Nothing is the same without her. Like when I go all out making a nice meal and how I always call Amber on the phone to tell her what I made and how it came out. Then she would either tell me about how what she made was far more exquisite (or at least sounded that way) or how she was just doing pizza or something simple because it was just too long a day to go all out. I miss the phone calls throughout the day. Or talking to her on her way home from work. I even miss her telling me to call back because Sex In The City was on. I miss her getting mad because I was always borrowing her clothes. (She did have style) I miss watching her transform into the amazing mother she became. Most of all I just miss her. I love you Amber. I just wanted to let you know.