Hey Hun. I miss you so much. I would give anything to have you back with me. I need you here to talk to. I need you to listen, I need you to help me. My whole life has been hell since you left. I need your advise. I need to hear you laugh, and to see you smile. I want to be able to call you ten times a day, to talk about nothing at all. I want to be able to ask you what movie it was, you know... the one with the guy and they went to that place... Or ask you what band played that song that says "I'll always love you" but I can't remember the tune or if a guy or girl sings it. You'll tell me right off and I'll say "Oh yeah, that was it. Thanks!"
I miss confiding in you, I miss talking to you because I wasn't sure if I could be a good wife to my husband. Like you said, "Marriage is hard, and the work it takes to make it work is never-ending". I miss asking you for parenting advise because you're such a great mom.
I need your guidance on so many things. Sometimes I feel like I've forgotten. I've forgotten how to be a good mom. I've forgotten how to be any kind of wife. I've forgotten how to listen. I am just so angry all the time, and I need you to calm me down. I feel so alone now. I've felt so alone for One year-Eight months-Two weeks-and Four days now. People don't talk about you much anymore. I hate that people can just let go so easily. I do my best to remind everyone about you. Tori and Anna still remember, and they miss you dearly. I take Erik as often as possible. I never forget to tell him how much he looks just like you. And I never fail to tell him how much you love him. It hurts to think that his memories of you may not be strong enough to last him a lifetime.
You would be so proud of him though. You would be so proud of all the kids. Adam is getting so big. He's two now. Running all over the place, and constantly learning new things. He talks more and more each day. I show him the pictures of you holding him, and I tell him about you. It breaks my heart to think Adam won't have the benefit of his own memories of you. I guess everyone deals with loss differently, but I just wish I had someone to talk to about it. Even now, when things get hard, my first thoughts of comfort come from thinking of you.
I miss you sorely and I would give everything to have you back. I Love You!