It does not hurt as much to think of Amber on her once special day. It is still a special season for those who hold our own memories of her laughter, love, and tears. Like the season itself, it is a time for celebrating the cycle of life, the death of a god, and the hope for burgeoning new life. It is about remembering lost loved ones and giving thanks for all our blessings and the lives that have joined our ever-extending family this last year. It is about getting fat to cope with the bitter cold of winter... (Or bitterly coping with getting fat as we approach winter.)
Sadly, the life we live we often take for granted. The choices we make may not necessarily be the best ones, but ones made necessarily. So we hope to make a series of mostly right ones, and hope that history and family forgive us when we emerge mostly unscathed. We are fortunate, even when resources are scarce, or our hearts quiver from within their self-fashioned, abysmal darkness. Keep your face to the Sunshine...
Take stock of this year, and ask yourself did I make a contribution? Would she have been proud of my choices? Hug your loved ones, and love them more and tell them so. Happy Birthday, darling.